


The Start of a Beautiful Friendship

by Magnetic_Stars



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: A slight game of wits, Blood, Both are incredibly extra, Gotham season 4, Guns, Jerome is amused, Other, Victor is pretentious, light hearted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:29:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27044293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magnetic_Stars/pseuds/Magnetic_Stars
Summary: Victor Zsasz approaches Jerome Valeska in an attempt to sell him something he can’t refuse.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	The Start of a Beautiful Friendship

**Author's Note:**

> This one-shot is based on a prompt recommended to me by a Tumblr user. I have to be honest, this was *too much* fun to write. Can't believe I never considered writing something involving these two lunatics before. They were meant to be best friends.

Jerome occupied Oswald’s dining room alone. He’d warned others not to disturb him in there while he reviewed his plans. The blueprints dispersed across the dining table were sacred and top-secret information, reserved only for his eyes and not even to be shared with his Legion of Horribles. Anyone to interrupt him knew what they’d have coming their way. The few who ventured in there unannounced while Jerome worked suffered the dire consequences. Needless to say, none ever lived.

Jerome yawned into his fist as he reviewed his strategies. It was a slow day filled with nothing but his self-assigned homework, and his boredom intensified with each passing minute. All work and no play made Jerome a very, very moody man.

A soft knock shattered his concentration. Clenching his jaw, his hand formed into a fist atop the table.

“Private meeting of one!” he called out. “Come in and I’ll decorate the wall with your brains.”

“Sorry for the interruption, boss,” came Carl’s nervous voice. “There’s a Victor Zsasz is here to see you.”

“Nope. Doesn’t ring a bell. Tell him to hit his head on the way out and _don’t_ interrupt me again.”

“But, boss-”

“Carl,” Jerome sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Do you **_want_** to decorate the walls of this dull room?”

To his ultimate surprise, the door opened. A surge of both fury and excitement coursed through his veins as Jerome got up, reached for his gun, and prepared to shoot Carl between the eyes. With his grin morbidly wide, his finger flexed against the trigger… only to slacken a few seconds later.

Carl came into view first, his movements jerky and his eyes casted down. Jerome would’ve pulled the trigger had he not realized that Carl was being pushed in. A bald man came into sight, completely clad in a black attire and bullet proof vest. He held a gun to Carl’s back as he nudged him into the room first, using him as a human shield. A friendly smile was etched onto his face.

“Hi there,” he greeted casually. “Bad time? Should I come back with an appointment?”

Amused, Jerome dragged his eyes from the strange man, to the shivering Carl, and then back again with a curious glint.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Jerome aimed the gun at Carl’s abdomen and fired. His painful wails filled the room before his knees buckled together as he collapsed. Poor Carl. Poor, _useless_ , Carl. Whether anyone was threatened to venture into the meeting room by a loaded gun or not, _no one_ interrupted Jerome.

Jerome and Zsasz remained facing one another with their weapons pointed at each other’s heads. Jerome’s eyes were crackling with flames, while Victor’s were considerably lukewarm, unfazed by his dead shield.

“Didn’t have to do that,” he said, pouting as he gazed at the blood pooling at his feet. “Now you’ve ruined your carpet.” He tutted under his breath.

“You’ve got three seconds to grab my attention, Baldy, before you, too, can ruin this carpet. One… Two…”

“So, you’re Jerome Valeska, huh?” Victor, unaffected, went on coolly. “Big fan of your work, although I gotta say, you’re not what I expected. Pictured you somewhat… scarier? Grosser, maybe?”

“Take a look in the mirror, pal,” Jerome rasped out, his grin solidly in place. “So, I’ve got myself an admirer, have I?”

“Not exactly.”

“Hmm. I’m still pending on that one second, Baldy.”

Oddly, Victor lowered his gun and pocketed it into his holster. Skeptical, Jerome kept his own gun pointed at Victor’s head.

“Thought you might be interested in what I have to sell.”

Jerome snorted. “Better be a new carpet.”

To his greatest shock, Victor laughed. It’d been a long, long time since someone had laughed at one of his jokes. He’d almost forgotten how it felt. It made his grin stretch further in delight.

“Would probably make a more profitable career for me, but no,” Victor replied. “I’ve got information that might be of some interest to you.”

“Is that right?” Then, almost like something had just registered within him, Jerome frowned. “Who are you again?”

“Oh, Victor Zsasz. Certified assassin and professional eavesdropper.”

“Something tells me that’s not true.”

Victor grinned. “Think so? Wait till you hear what I found out about Penguin, your right-hand man.”

Hook, line, and sinker. Jerome was officially intrigued. He lowered the gun but kept it close at a safe distance. He took his seat again, resting his elbows atop the table and touching his fingers together in mock consolidation.

“You’ve got my attention. Go on.”

Victor paced to the center of the room, letting his eyes idly roam over the poor interior design. “Seems to me your partner-in-crime isn’t exactly as loyal as you might think.”

Jerome chuckled lowly. “Tell me something I _don’t_ know.”

“Overheard him talking to Gordon. Jim Gordon. Know of him?”

A low growl rumbled within Jerome’s chest. “Like he ever lets me forget…”

“Well, our buddy Penguin spoiled your plans to the GCPD’s head dog. It was followed by an emotional rant which I, personally, found very entertaining. Had to leave halfway through to get here before he does, but take my word for it, it was a great soliloquy. I could act it out if you like, give you a visual.”

Snickering, Jerome shook his head. “You think this is news to me? I knew he’d run off to ol’ Jimbo as soon as his nerves caved in. In fact, I was counting on it.”

“Figured. Bet you haven’t even disclosed your full plan to him, too, judging by how little he told Gordon when compared with the stacks of blueprints you’re swimming in. He only knows the tip of the iceberg, doesn’t he.”

Jerome narrowed his eyes at him. “Clever, Baldy. Unfortunately, I’m now only convinced that you’re a lousy eavesdropper who doesn’t know how to sell information. You’re supposed to demand ransom _before_ you spill the beans, dummy.”

“Oh, that wasn’t the beans,” Victor assured, mirth playing in his eyes. “That was just a teaser. No, what I’m selling is what Gordon plans on doing to get you caught.”

Jerome scoffed. “Easily predictable. Not interested.”

“Also,” Victor drawled, carelessly brushing the fluff off his sleeve. “I just so happen to be Penguin’s former right-hand-man, and I have lots of _juicy_ information in here just waiting to be spilled,” he said, tapping a teasing finger against his temple.

Jerome couldn’t deny that he was amused by this man for some strange reason or another. Maybe he found him genuinely intriguing, maybe it’s because he added an interesting twist to his boring afternoon, maybe it’s even because he laughed at his simple joke.

“Why seek me out to tattle on your former boss?” he asked curiously.

Victor lazily shrugged. “Got bored. This seemed like fun.”

Jerome bawled out an unexpected cackle. Nothing had ever resonated with him more than that answer.

“That was good!” he said gleefully. “You just earned yourself some bonus points! What kind of payment, is worth all that juicy information, pray tell?”

The grin that grew on Victor’s face was positively jovial with a mischievous tug. “Looks to me like you’re in need of a new ‘Carl’ around here.”

Jerome’s eyes brightened. “On, no. Out with the old and in with the new. I’ve got a better position in mind for you. How soon can you start?”

“Right away. _Boss_.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed this drabble and, as always, comment to let me know what you think!


End file.
